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Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Online Dating - The First Email

I have gotten emails from a bunch of you asking me about what to include in the first email. In my opinion, the first email is the most critical part of the entire process, because this is where she is going to decide whether or not she wants to connect with you.

In a nutshell, you MUST at least give her the illusion that you read her profile and are not sending her the same email you sent to 30 other women. At the very least, include her name somewhere and ask her a question about something in her profile (think outside the box). One girl I wrote to had a picture in her profile which I could tell was taken in Australia, so I asked her about her trip. She wrote back and told me she was impressed that I recognized it, especially since she did not mention traveling there anywhere in her written profile. There is a boatload more I can write on this topic, but Ill save that for another time. If any of you guys have specific questions, feel free to drop me an email at

One alternative to writing the first email is to create a compelling enough profile that prompts HER to write a first email to YOU. Some basic tips on pulling this off:

1. Get some professional photos taken. Not only will they be better quality pictures than every other jackass on the site, but it will also show women that you are serious about online dating.

2. Put your pictures up on and find out which ones get the highest ratings. Use those for your profile.

3. Find a dating site you are comfortable with. This could be based on where you live, religion, interests, etc. I personally prefer, and

4. Check out your competition. Look at other guy's profiles in your area who match your age and general description. You'll notice that they all write the same boring shit in their profiles. MAKESURE NONE OF WHAT THEY WRITE APPEARS ANYWHERE IN YOUR PROFILE. Remember, the goal is to be different than everyone else.

5. Be creative. Think outside the box.

6. And most importantly, DO NOT BE AFRAID TO OFFEND ANYBODY with your profile and/or emails. If they get turned off by something you wrote, its THEIR problem.

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - ApproachDynamics/Online Dating Edge

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Good stuff- you really could write a book.