For more information about our services, including online dating profile rewrites and critiques, live workshops on approaching women and starting conversations as well as private coaching sessions, click here.
Now available from Online Dating Edge...

THE PROCESS: HOW TO GO FROM A FIRST CONTACT WITH A WOMAN TO AN IN-PERSON FIRST MEETING






Tuesday, July 31, 2007

E-Harmony: Time's Worst Site of 2007 [article/video]

Got a dating question? Email us at Dating@ApproachDynamics.com

In a recent article by Time.com, eHarmony has been listed as one of the worst sites of 2007.

It is bad enough that some guys and girls are already disappointed by their dating prospects, but now a site exists that rejects people as "unmatchable". This group of 'rejects' includes homosexuals and people with depression. Check out this video from one of MY favorite sites, Chemistry.com:


And as for those that DO manage to make the cut after filling out that 436 question survey, eHarmony's advice to those that have been given terrible matches (this site does not allow you to search - rather, they send YOU a list of 'matches') is to 'stick it out.' Of course, the longer you 'stick it out', the more you pay (hey Beavis... he said 'stick it out'... hehehehe).

Stick to a site which allows you to craft an OUTSTANDING profile or let us help you out.

Also listed on Time.com's five worst websites:
2. Evite.com: I don't mind this one. In fact, I kinda like it. As for the extensive advertising, let's remember that this site is FREE and very USEFUL.
3. Meez.com: Don't know this one. Perhaps that's just my age showing ;)
4. Myspace: Put aside for a moment what I said about advertising on Evite, this site has gone WAY over the edge. And to make matters worse, we now have a constant barrage of spammers and 'Russian strippers' asking to be our friends. Stick to Facebook.
5. Secondlife.com: Another site I know nothing about, but based on Time's write-up, it looks kinda lame. If you have a different opinion, I'd love to hear it.

We have our vote in for www.onlinedatingedge.com as best site of the year for 2007/2008. Help us out will you... favorite us on technorati.

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - All rights reserved
Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Saturday, July 28, 2007

The Games Women Play... [video]

Know why guys are so far behind women when it comes to social development? Here's why:



Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - All rights reserved
Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Friday, July 27, 2007

Family Guy Gets Kicked in the Nuts [video]

Yes, we're going off topic, but here's some comic relief for a Friday afternoon. Enjoy!



Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - All rights reserved
Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Dating: When Should I Get Engaged, and How? [video]

Got a dating question? Email us at Dating@ApproachDynamics.com

QUESTION FROM A READER:

Hey guys. I can't believe I am actually writing in to a website with a question. I needed an "outside" opinion and you 2 are about as outside as it gets. Am I ready for marriage and if I am how should I propose?
Tom D., Miami, FL

********MY COMMENTS********
Heh? What?

You really gave us a lot to go on, dude. How would we know if you're ready? Only YOU know if you are ready or not. Some say that since you are asking, you are not ready. I don't necessarily agree with that since you brought up engagement scenarios. In my humble and nonprofessional opinion, that makes it seem like the answer is, "yes, I'm ready, but nervous."

Ask yourself a few questions:

1. Do you "know" and are happy with the person you are in a relationship with?
2. Are you emotionally secure with your past? In other words, have you "moved on" from past relationships, both good and bad?
3. Do you know how to compromise and are you READY to compromise? Marriage is about give and take.
4. Are you prepared to be honest and share your life with this person? Further, have you been totally honest to this point? We take marriage seriously and hope you will as well.
5. When you look at her, can you envision spending the rest of your life with her?
6. Do the two of you have a common plan for the future - i.e. children, travel, priorities?
7. Are you yourself stable, unrelated to her (financially, emotionally, career-wise, etc.)?

As for engagement scenarios, the sky's the limit. But make sure you do something that is special, memorable, and meaningful to HER. Let's face it, it should be one of the happiest days of your life, but for MOST it means more to the woman (stereotypical?).

Just promise us one thing. DON'T be a tool and pop the question at a crowded venue such as a sports arena (unless there is some sort of sentimental reason for it, i.e. you met there). Not only is this scenario embarrassing and cheesy, but it is also selfish on your part. Remember, this moment is all about HER.

And for those of you who think that popping the question in a public place will guarantee you a 'yes', think again. Check out THIS jackass...



Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - All rights reserved
Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Thursday, July 26, 2007

Online Dating: What to Do if She Doesn't Write You Back

Got a dating question? Write to us at Dating@ApproachDynamics.com.

I am happy to say that the Boston seminar was a HUGE success. About 40 guys came out to hear our presentation on women and dating. Stephen gave a speech entitled, 'How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love a Conversation', followed by my presentation entitled 'Ok, She Sent Me a Message. Now What?', in which I showed everyone how to get from a first contact with a woman to a first meeting. Stay tuned to the blog for future articles on the specific topics we covered.

Today's article stems from a question I received during the Q&A portion of my presentation. One of the side effects of getting really good at this stuff is that you hit a point where it is not physically possible to write back all the women you are going to be hearing from (and I'm just talking about the ones you actually WANT to write back!). This is what they call in life a 'good problem'. But a problem nonetheless.

I was then asked if this same rationale applies to women that don't write guys back. Now the guy who asked me this has been in situations where he was too busy to write certain women back (poor bastard, I know), and was hoping that if a woman did not write HIM back, he could try and reconnect by sending another email.

********MY COMMENTS********

NO.

Well, you can (and should) try, as you have nothing to lose. But don't hold your breath.

One of the big topics I spoke about was a woman's interest level in a guy. My point was that if a woman has moderate to low interest level in you, then you should get rid of her immediately and move on to friendlier waters. This is another reason why you should be dating multiple women simultaneously until you find 'the one'. Yes, she is doing it too.

Let's look at this rationally. If a woman is really into a guy, is she going to write him back? Uhh... yeah. But if she is unsure about someone and something better comes up, is that guy going to be a priority for her? Not at all.

So here's what you do. Send a quick, one line email:
"What, playing hard to get already? Nice! Talk to me..." Then see what happens.

From my own experience, I will usually (about 2/3 of the time) get a response. Generally something along the lines of "sorry, I was busy". But I can also tell you that I have NEVER actually made it to a date with any of these women. They are either TRULY too busy to meet people, have low to moderate interest level or are just flaky.

In my opinion, try sending the quick email if you wish, but focus on the ones that actually write you back.

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - All rights reserved
Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Some Fun and Inexpensive Date Ideas

Here's a good look at 20 dates for under $20. Who said you need to spend a lot of money to have fun? Just remember that there is a difference between inexpensive and cheap. Happy Dating!

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - OnlineDating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Seven Keys to Creating a Captivating Online Dating Profile

For more information about our services, including online dating profile rewrites and critiques, as well as live approach workshops, click here.

Let’s face it. The substance and presentation of your internet dating profile is single-handedly going to make or break your success online. In order to get noticed by women amid the sea of chodes in the online dating world, you are going to have to stand out. In fact, a sharp and witty profile is so COVETED by women on these sites, that they will actually be contacting YOU.

Here are seven keys to creating a captivating online profile:

1. Your photos: This is the FIRST place she is going to look. Make sure you have a lead picture which makes you look your best. Use hotornot.com to test out your photos.

2. Proper grammar and spelling: Now granted, the rules here are a little different, as this is not a professional journal or an English exam. However, there is absolutely no excuse for ANY spelling errors, missing punctuation or improper word forms (i.e. complement instead of compliment, there vs. they’re, etc.). At the very least, spell-check your profile and have a friend proofread it before it is published.

3. Avoid meaningless adjectives: Don’t SAY that you are funny, smart or adventurous - SHOW that you are. Tell a funny story, mention what you like to do for fun around town, or talk about that time you went rafting in Switzerland.

4. NO CLICHES: It is already assumed that you enjoy both going out and staying in, that you love to laugh and that you are seeking your ‘partner in crime’. Avoid these phrases like the plague. In fact, these sayings have become so overused that even MAKING FUN of them in your profile has become a cliche of its own.

5. Use the passive tone: Instead of just spewing out facts, write your profile as if you are talking directly to the person that is reading it. Instead of saying ‘the person I am looking for is smart, sexy, etc.’, try something along the lines of, “you are happy, compassionate and reflexively kind...”

6. No negativity or pessimistic language: Your life sucks? Keep it to yourself. The online dating world is not a sounding board for you to gripe about the world. No matter what your situation is in life, there is ALWAYS a way to put a positive spin on things.

7. Brevity is KEY: Ronald Reagan once said that if you cannot write about something in one page or less, then you don’t understand it. The same rules apply for online dating. Having an excessively long profile is going to scare off potential readers, even if your information happens to be good. Remember, give a woman a GLIMPSE into your world, without giving away too much of the plot.

At Approach Dynamics, our goal is to help you present yourself in your best light. Remember, first impressions are EVERYTHING, and having a creative, well-written profile will help you stand out from the crowd - a MUST for success in the online dating world.

We offer a number of different services for online dating, including email and phone consultations to answer any of your individual questions, a detailed critique of your existing online profile, or if you wish, we will write you a new one from scratch (with an emphasis on making sure it sounds like YOU). We look forward to working with you.

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - Approach Dynamics / Online Dating Edge

How NOT to Touch Women [video]

A while ago, we wrote an article on the Power of a Light Touch on the Arm when approaching a women. Well, there is a RIGHT way and a WRONG way to touch a women.

Here is a video of Andy Dick on the Jimmy Kimmel Show, showing us what can happen when you touch a woman the wrong way. Kudos to Ivanka Trump for keeping her cool while being felt up by Mr. Dick (I can't think of a more appropriate name for this dude).



Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Monday, July 23, 2007

Live Earth - The Forgotten Post

By popular request, here is the synopsis of a few of our approaches from the Live Earth Concert at Giants Stadium. As a reminder, Approach Dynamics will be conducting another Live Approach Training at the Saw Doctors concert on Saturday, August 11, 2007 at Irving Plaza in Manhattan. Seats are filling up FAST, so if you want in, click here and sign up.

1. Upon moving towards our seats, I noticed a row of 4 girls sitting by themselves. Showtime! I moved in with "The Jackal" and "Iggy" and quickly things were progressing. They all happened to graduate a year ago from "The Dalton School" (Reverse Gold Digger?) and are currently attending Indiana University. Conversation flowed well, and after a little banter, we went on listening to the music and talking amongst ourselves. They quickly clamored for more attention. Props to "The Jackal" and "Iggy" for their good work!

2. About 3 hours after the debacle with the "rude girl", Jackal made another attempt. He moved in on a different girl in the set, who looked like someone had shot her dog.
"Come on, lets have some fun!" he said jovially.
NO RESPONSE...
(Playing dumb and having fun) "Are you ok?"
"She's fine," said the blocker (biatch 1)
"I'm ok," the girl promptly responded.
Another blocker, a bony, weird looking guy in a V neck t-shirt said in a hostile voice picking a fight, "hey where's your ticket, dick?"
The Jackal: "In my pocket, I'm sure you'd like to get it."

Then Jackal turned to the target with a smile and said, "sorry everyone here is so angry... try and have some fun."
As he returned, Jackal shook his head and said, "Wow, what a sad bunch."

No truer words had been spoken!

3. After our foray into the college scene, I proceeded to move in on a more mature woman. A lovely 30 year old lawyer from NJ. She approached me about how much she loved my kissing penguins shirt. PEACOCKING at an environmental venue! :) She started getting all cerebral with me about carbon emissions, global warming, and electricity generation. Good thing I have multiple degrees in related fields! She was smitten. She asked if she could give me her email so that maybe we could get together.

4. Upon leaving the show, I noticed a girl on top of a 3 to 4 foot high divider, which was separating buses that were heading back to Manhattan from a huge crowd of concertgoers. She was looking around and yelling out to people she went to the show with.

"What's going on at the front of the line 'Girl On Top'?" I asked her.

She smiled while loving the attention and we proceeded to have some friendly double-entendre laden conversation.

The Jackal then climbed up onto the divider with the 'Girl on Top' for a little bit, while I ran interference with her other girlfriends down below. As we got on the buses, Jackal asked for and received the golden digits. Once again, well done my young apprentice!

Lessons learned here? It's all about having fun. Don't worry about the outcomes of any particular interaction, "IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER". Oh yeah, and fruity-looking guys in v-neck t-shirts like hanging out with bizatches.

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - Approach Dynamics / Online Dating Edge

Thursday, July 19, 2007

Man Lives With 100 Sex Dolls [video]

Got a dating question? Email us at Dating@ApproachDynamics.com

moli_view_120x90

Update on the Boston Seminar:
We are all set for our seminar with the Boston Lair this Saturday, July 21. Stephen will be giving an approach presentation entitled ‘How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love a Conversation', while I will be speaking on internet dating. Specifically, I am going to be focusing on what to do from the time of your first ‘connection' with a woman online, until the first time you meet in person.

We are also expecting an appearance from the ‘Boston Mauler', who has vowed to expose himself to all of us (see the comments section of our article, ‘Dating: Take Her to Ikea').

If you are in the Boston area and would like to attend, or would like more information on joining the Boston Lair, drop us an email at Dating@ApproachDynamics.com and we'll set you up with the Lair guys.
********
Lavalife.com

Now why is it SO important to learn how to interact with women? So you don't end up like THIS guy...



Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - Online Dating Edge / ApproachDynamics

Debate '08: Obama Girl vs Giuliani Girl [video]

Got a dating question? Email us at Dating@ApproachDynamics.com

Regardless of your political beliefs, Barak Obama and Rudy Giuliani have apparently done something right. They have created an image that makes women dance in the streets after them! Here is "Debate '08: Obama Girl vs Giuliani Girl" the video.



Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Accidental Porn: My Favorite City [image]

Over 2000 sizes!



For a confused look, tell them the guys from Online Dating Edge sent ya...

Photo by Alexander Stone - Copyright 2007
Box City, Marina Del Rey, CA

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

How NOT to Handle the Dating Personals [Video]

Got a dating question? Email us at Dating@ApproachDynamics.com

Here is how NOT to act when placing a personal ad. Enjoy!


Video from SelectedHilarity.com - Courtesy of YouTube

I think we have found a perfect match for that girl from the Live Earth Concert.

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Monday, July 16, 2007

Video: The First Date - Does Your Car Matter?

Got a dating question? Email us at Dating@ApproachDynamics.com

Is the type of car that you drive going to have any influence on whether or not your first date will be successful?

In an attempt to answer that question, some interns from cars.com went around the streets of downtown Chicago asking women how they would react if a guy showed up for a first date driving different types of cars. Here are the results:


Video courtesy of YouTube

Now let's remember, these women are being put on the spot in front of a camera on a busy street. Given these circumstances, it is no surprise that their answers pretty much mirrored society's stereotypical views on those cars.

In reality, the type of car that you drive is NOT going to have very much of an influence on the success of your date (or at least it BETTER not, or you have trouble on your hands). Then again, in New York City, the mere fact that I HAVE a car puts me at the head of the pack.

However, you can be assured that the CONDITION of your car WILL be a factor. Before picking up a woman, make sure your car is clean - both inside and outside. Get rid of any stupid ornaments, such as fuzzy dice or goofy bumper stickers. If your car has any visible body damage (and you don't have a kick-ass story as to how it got there), you might want to consider taking another car.

But that being said, you should STILL never give a direct answer if a woman throws you a shit test by asking you what kind of car you drive. I like to tell them I drive a converted ice cream truck.

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Sunday, July 15, 2007

Video: First Date - A Tribute to Every Video Site

Got a dating question? Email us at Dating@ApproachDynamics.com

Here is a really funny video put out by Pandasmash, which looks at how each of the other video sites (Youtube, iFilm, AtomFilms, Jibjab, etc.) would conduct a 'First Date'. Ironically, Pandasmash did not have an embedding code on their page, and I had to get this from YouTube. Hmm.



Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Saturday, July 14, 2007

Online Dating: Dr. Keith Ablow

Got a dating question? Email us at Dating@ApproachDynamics.com

I’m currently working with a few clients down in Florida (Ormond Beach, Daytona Beach, and Miami) and thought I finally had a few moments to relax. No such luck! I sat down after hitting the beach and flicked on the television and found a program on internet dating. There goes relaxation! I grabbed a pen and started taking notes...

The show was called ‘Dr. Keith Ablow’. Apparently the host is a doctor of some sort, although I’m not quite sure of what. I’ve never heard of the guy before, but then again, I don’t get to watch much daytime television. It’s a talk show much like Dr. Phil, except this Ablow guy isn’t Oprah’s bitch, and there were no alien sightings or guys deathly afraid of PEACHES, a la Maury Povich. Check out THIS nutjob...



The Dr. Keith episode was entitled, “Can You Find Love Online, or NOT?” Here’s a brief rundown:

1. A girl and guy (approx 30 to 35 years old) were interviewed about their lack of success with online dating. Apparently the girl found the guy online and based upon his profile she set up a date with him (really a first meeting) and had a camera follow them on the date. She strolled into a café with her dog and acted like a total biatch herself! (WOW! Two mistakes right off the bat!) On her behalf, the guy also lied about his height (3 inches I think) and his photo was at least a year or two old. These two could have REALLY used our help.

2. Another gentleman was carted onto the stage where his lack of success was also discussed. Well, I suppose lack of success is how you define it. He has dated over 700 women in the New York City area (poor bastard, I KNOW), but unfortunately has not found love. Then again, he never outwardly said that he was in fact looking for love. He seemed quite proud of his accomplishments, and was chided by the audience about having a spreadsheet entry for each woman he has dated.

The use of a spreadsheet is in actuality a FANTASTIC idea. This helps keep one organized and allows for easy access and editing. This is an especially useful tool for those of you that are serial daters, are looking for multiple long term relationships (MLTRs), or wish to maintain backup booty calls. Note: we DO NOT encourage lying or being a jerk- but if that’s your thing, a spreadsheet is a must! Stay tuned for a future article on how (and why) you should date multiple people.

3. Next up were an older man and younger woman, who met on sugardaddyforme.com. They are currently married and she discussed how the relationship started off as a typical sugardaddy/sugarbaby relationship but evolved into love. Now, I have a hard time swallowing that, but who am I to judge? If being a sugardaddy is your thing go for it, if not read our articles on “How to Spot a Gold Digger.” According to the woman, what attracted her to his profile was his screen name (GRUMPYOLDMAN). The lesson learned here is to be creative or seek help.

4. Another happily married couple who met online was then brought onto the stage (NOTE: The wife had previously dated the guy with the spreadsheet! Small world…) One interesting comment was made by the husband. He said he had been using online dating for only a couple of months when he met his soon to be wife, but the hardest thing for him was going home after a date to emails from five new women. Remember, KNOW what you are looking for, don’t settle, and when you find it, don’t keep looking for the bigger better deal.

5. Finally, a couple of ‘experts’ were brought on and they stressed the importance of date coaching. One of whom was Virginia Vitzthum, author of 'I Love You, Let’s Meet' (NOTE - It sounded good on the show, but I haven’t read it).

Think of this way. If you have never been to a gym before, or you have been going but are not getting the results you want, you seek out the help of a personal trainer or coach to assist you. Online dating is no different - and that’s where we come in.

We are available for all you dating needs: profile critique, profile writing, photo selection, screen names, and long term coaching to answer any and all you dating related questions check out or services page or email us at Dating@ApproachDynamics.com.

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - OnlineDating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Hope This is Not a Pickup Joint [image]

Got a dating question? Email us at Dating@ApproachDynamics.com

Here’s a restaurant you’ll never catch ME eating at...


Photo by Alexander Stone - Copyright 2007

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Friday, July 13, 2007

Dating: Take Her to IKEA

Got a dating question? Drop us a note at Dating@ApproachDynamics.com

Yesterday we looked at a Jdater's essay about taking a girl to Costco for an ‘ideal first date'. I mentioned that this type of date is actually a GREAT idea, but Costco is probably not the best choice of venue. So if you are going to go this route (and be prepared to win points for being creative and ballsy), head over to IKEA.

Here's what you do. Start at the snack bar and grab some coffee and one of those Swedish desserts (nothing TOO messy). Then sit down at one of the kitchen tables and chat for a little while. From there, be creative. You can head to one of the sofas and start a pillow fight. Or you can grab a salesperson (if you can find one!) and tell him you are newlyweds who are expecting twins. Have him show you some bunk beds. And who knows? Maybe you'll get to try one of them out...

This date also gives you the opportunity to see HER creative side. Take her down to the marketplace and get her sense of style. See what kind of furniture, accessories and prints she is into. Are you guys gonna gel?

Now getting back to those points you are going to score. Ask yourself how many times this woman has been on the same boring 'dinner and a movie' date. Then try and guess how many guys have taken her to IKEA. Exactly. She'll be talking about this one for a LONG time. (TIP - scope the place out before your date and figure out your way around. Ikea is notoriously difficult to navigate).

It is also QUITE hard to spend a lot of money on an Ikea date. This is a FUN and INEXPENSIVE venue, and it also sets a good tone for future dates with her. After all, you really can't go anywhere but UP from here. Of course, have a plan for something else to do afterwards in case you want the date to continue.

You can set up the date with something like this:
"Hey, let's hang out [Sunday]. I am heading over to Ikea to grab a few things. You should come. Maybe I'll let you pick some stuff out..."

Good luck!

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - Approach Dynamics / Online Dating Edge

Thursday, July 12, 2007

Online Dating: 'My Perfect First Date'

Regardless of which dating websites you are using, there are going to be a series of short answer questions included as part of your online profile. Some essays, such as ‘About Me' and ‘The Person I am Looking For' are pretty much universal to all online dating sites (and what we at Online Dating Edge assist you with creating - click here for more info).

In addition to the basics, each website also has their own unique set of paragraphs. These additional sections of your profile are PRIME opportunities to show off your creative side - so don't overlook them!

JDate, for instance, has a section entitled, "My Ideal First Date." Not only is this question a good opportunity to show your sense of humor and originality, but you can also find out some interesting info on others by reading what they have to say.

For example, if a woman is talking about fancy restaurants and swanky lounges rather than a quiet place where the two of you can get to know one another, you may have a gold digger on your hands. On the same note, if a guy is talking about 'long walks on the beach' or 'dinner and a movie' while looking forward to calling you the next day, the WUSS alarm should be going off.

Here is an example of a guy's answer to this JDate question (sent by one of our female readers):
********
My Ideal First Date:

It's not where you are but who you are with right? If we're on a first date, I'm talking you to COSTCO. It has plenty of delicious free samples for us to chow on. There is usually a good movie in the TV section. They sell clothes and books, so we can talk reading and fashion. The home section has swings and a fountain (very romantic!). To get an a bit of a rush, we can go and smell the new tire stacks. Guess whats next to COSTCO? That's right. Home Depot. But that would have to be a second date.
********

I don't think he realizes it, but this guy is actually ON to something. Stores with many different departments are FUN places to go for a first date. But putting aside the creativity of his answer for a moment, there are a few things this guy can do to GREATLY improve this response. Here they are:

1. Grammar, grammar, grammar - Missing commas, sentence fragments, a lost apostrophe and getting 'an a bit of a rush' will KILL your profile. It also detracts from your central message.

2. Lack of mystery - By identifying the place and specifically what he intends to do there, this dude has essentially RUINED the possibly of using this as an actual date (which is a shame, because this is a GREAT idea). Why would a woman be excited about going somewhere when she knows everything that is going to happen ahead of time?

This dude could have accomplished the SAME result (and MORE) by saying something along the lines of the following:

"I am going to take you to a place you have NEVER been for a first date. Somewhere SO obvious, yet so elusive. Imagine having an INFINITE number of exciting things to do, all under one roof! If you think you can handle it, that is. If not, I hear that the guy two profiles before me is into long walks on the beach and Michael Jackson records."

3. Slight change of venue - Costco is a madhouse. There is stuff piled up everywhere, the aisles are crowded, and the foosball table is missing a goalie (and all the balls!). There is also no sofa to sit on while you attempt to watch your romantic movie on the 13 inch tv/vcr combo. Great idea, wrong spot.

Tomorrow we are going to examine one of my favorite places for a creative, yet inexpensive first date... stay tuned!

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Is Online Dating Just an Excuse For Avoiding Approach Anxiety?

www.approachdynamics.com

Comment from a reader:

"Online game doesn't do jack to build your skills. It's just a way of avoiding approach anxiety."

********MY RESPONSE********

Well, I guess that all depends on what your goals are. If you are looking to improve your skills approaching women in the field and you are spending all your time behind a computer screen, then yes, I suppose you would be correct about avoiding approach anxiety.

But if your goal is to simply meet women, online dating is a GREAT way to go about it (as well as one of the EASIEST). There are literally MILLIONS of women on the various websites, and we already know off the bat that they are single and looking for guys.

I also disagree with the notion that online dating doesn’t improve your dating skills. The purpose of online dating is (or at least it SHOULD be) to get an actual DATE. There is going to come a point when you will have to come out from behind your computer and actually MEET these women.

If you are doing things correctly, by the time you have an in-person meeting with a woman you met online, you have already exchanged 2-3 emails (hopefully not more than that) and have spoken on the phone once (no more than 15-20 minutes... save it for when you meet!). You guys should have PLENTY to talk about.

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Breaking 'The Rules'

www.ApproachDynamics.com

There was an interesting article in Sunday's New York Times, entitled He Forgot To Call? Oh, No Big Deal, which documented the author's dysfunctional journey from the dating world into marriage.

What impressed me most about this article was how the author finally achieved success in her dating life once she starting doing the EXACT OPPOSITE of everything stated in 'The Rules'.

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Monday, July 9, 2007

How to Handle Rude Women - The 'Low Self-Esteem' Comeback

www.ApproachDynamics.com

Well, it's been quite a week...

I am happy to say that my first full week off in nearly two years was a HUGE success. Monday I got to see Rush totally rock out at Jones Beach (with a nice intro to Tom Sawyer, courtesy of our friends at South Park), Tuesday was golf with Stephen (who proceeded to make the 'beer bitch' blush... it was a beautiful thing!) and Wednesday through Friday had me taking in a little bit of the Montreal Jazz Festival. For those of you within driving distance of Montreal, you NEED to get up there. Stay tuned for an article on some excellent date spots while in town.

And then there was Saturday. While I could have done without the multiple Al Gore appearances, Live Earth certainly lived up to its billing - as did our Live Approach Training. The crowd was friendly, and there were several number/email closes throughout the day... and as promised, here's a shout out to the girls from IU!

But our most valuable lesson of the day (other than some environmental stuff that only Stephen can understand) came from the approach that DIDN'T work. Right before Ludacris took the stage, our row was blessed with the presence of a group of four (three women and their gay friend), including the girl you see here on the right. This girl had attitude right from the beginning, even going as far as not moving out of the way as other people were trying to get by. A bunch of us in the row were chatting when they sat down and we tried to include them, but they weren't having it. Not surprisingly, Stephen makes his move...

Stephen: (pointing to a tattoo on the girl's right ankle) "What does that say?"
Girl's friend: "It says ^&%% (inaudible)"
Stephen: (playfully) "Can't she answer for herself?"
Friend: "She didn't hear you"

Then the conversation just went from bad to worse...

Friend: "Can you, like, move down please? You are in one of OUR seats"
Stephen: "No one is sitting here"
Friend: "Well, her BOYFRIEND isn't going to be too happy when he gets here"
Stephen: (gives her the 'yeah, sure' look)
Friend: "And by the way, your SHIRT is really FUNNY looking"
Stephen: (laughs it off, gives them that 'you guys are REALLY pathetic' look and turns away)

What you have to realize about people that react to you like this is that they have (many) other personal issues in their lives that have NOTHING to do with you. Clinical psychiatrist Dr. Paul Dobransky gives us an EXCELLENT way to handle people that are unnecessarily rude and obnoxious to you. Rather than steal his thunder, watch the video below on "The Low Self-Esteem Comeback'...

Video taken from David Deangelo's 'Deep Inner Game', courtesy of YouTube

I can tell you from personal experience, this comeback REALLY WORKS. As was the case with our Bullfighter Chick, when someone lashes out at you like this, it has nothing to do with you. It's HER (or his) problem. Just remember not to try this on your boss! But that's another article for another day...


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Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Wednesday, July 4, 2007

Field Report: The Thong

www.ApproachDynamics.com

ANNOUNCEMENTS:

Our live approach bootcamp at Live Earth, Giants Stadium, on July 7, 2007 is COMPLETELY SOLD OUT!

We still have seats available for our FREE seminar on approaching women and internet dating in Boston on Saturday, July 21, 2007.

For more information, stay tuned to the blog or contact us at
Services@ApproachDynamics.com.

********
I'll admit it, there are just some things I just don't understand about women. Here's one - thongs. Don't get me wrong, I love the thong. But why do women wear them? I've been told "they're comfortable!" I don't beleive it! How can a string or cloth wedged in your ass be comfortable?

I have also been told, "I don't want panty lines." If I didn't want panty lines and it was "safe" to do so I'd just skip the underwear sooner than have that floss up there! Others have told me "it feels sexy." I can't understand how it "feels " that way but... even though I don't understand why, please don't stop wearing them!

The reason for my rant is simple. I was at a watering hole on Long Island called "Paddy McGees", when I noticed a young woman hanging over the fence of dock... at least I noticed her thong. I walked over and introduced myself.

"Hi, I'm Stephen."

"Hi I'm Jenna."

"Just had to tell you that you that you should wear a better thong."

"What?" (shocked, confused)

"The rest of you is great, the thong is the problem."

I explained that it seemingly had no personality and she should try one with rhinestones or something. She then pulled down at the side of her skirt in order to show me that it was in fact "bejeweled". We talked a few more moments and I asked for her number. DONE!

It really IS that simple. Just find something in the envirornment and use that for your opener. And who knows? If you are creative enough, maybe you can get a 'peek' (or more!).


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Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Monday, July 2, 2007

Approaching Women: Live Earth Concert

www.OnlineDatingEdge.com

ANNOUNCEMENTS:

Approach Dynamics will be conducting a live approach bootcamp at Live Earth, Giants Stadium, on July 7, 2007 - ONLY FOUR SPOTS LEFT!

We will also be conducting a FREE seminar on approaching women and internet dating in Boston on Saturday, July 21, 2007.

Contact us at
Services@ApproachDynamics.com for more information.

********
Some time ago, a question about a conversation in a concert environment was posed. It seems only fitting to bring up a kick-ass concert that will be happening in New York, London, Johannesburg, Rio de Janeiro, Shanghai, Tokyo, Sydney, and Hamburg VERY shortly - Live Earth. The concerts will be held simultaneously on July 7, 2007.

The great thing about this event is that it will be cross-generational. There will be people there of ALL ages and social groups, as can be seen by the groups playing New York's show. Any time you get Ludacris, Dave Matthews Band, Smashing Pumpkins, Melissa Etheridge, The Police and Kelly Clarkson on the same stage, something INTERESTING is gonna happen...

Concert festivals such as this are PRIME opportunities to meet women. The weather is nice, everyone is hanging out with their friends and there is a friendly, ‘community’ vibe in the air. And unlike trying to approach women in a loud envirornment, this festival is outdoors and you will actually get to hear the other person. Whether or not that’s a good thing is up to you ;)

Stephen and I will be conducting a live approach bootcamp at Giants Stadium before and during the festival. Space is going to be limited to ensure a small student/teacher ratio. Drop us a line for more info.


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Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics