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Now available from Online Dating Edge...

THE PROCESS: HOW TO GO FROM A FIRST CONTACT WITH A WOMAN TO AN IN-PERSON FIRST MEETING






Thursday, July 30, 2009

How should I act on a first date?

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Guys, how should I act on a first date? Rob

Wow, you really thought about the question and gave us a lot to work with! We've covered a first meeting before, but we'll post it again.

Keep the conversation light and funny. No heavy topics, no complaints, no insults.

Topics to avoid at all costs - Physical ailments, rape or violence, Star Trek, anything self-deprecating, anything overtly sexual, your arrest record, Dungeons and Dragons, ex-girlfriends, that time that you got drunk and wet yourself, religion, politics, marriage, children.

However, feel free to tease her a little. Once she says something you disagree with, playfully give her that "You are messing up your chances with me" look. Another line I like to use is "and you were doing SO well..." Don't be arrogant or condescending.

Stare at her face, NOT at her chest.

Do not lean into her. Lean back and make her come towards you. Also, do not face her directly when talking. Have her turn her body towards you.

Always pay for the first meeting. While you should never take her up on her feeble "how much do I owe you" routine, DO take notice if she fails to offer. And for god sakes, DON’T USE A COUPON.

No more than ONE compliment on the first meeting. And try to be more creative than, "You’re so hot."

DO NOT make plans for another date while out on this one. Leave her wondering. The key word here is CHALLENGE.

Be sure you are the one who ends the date first. Try to end it on a high note - leave her wanting more!

BOTTOM LINE:
BE RESPECFTUL AND COURTEOUS. BE YOURSELF. HAVE FUN.


Happy dating.

Now had you asked "How should I treat a woman?" We may have responded with this funny video from YouTube.

The 9 Ways To Treat A Woman



Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2009 - All rights reserved
Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Marriage-Maker Claims Are Tied in Knots -WSJ

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Carl "The Numbers Guy" Bialik's article in today's (July 29, 2009) Wall Street Journal calls out online dating sites such as eHarmony and Match.com for their advertised claims of members finding love and marriage. For example in television and online ads, eHarmony claims that 2% of American marriages last year were traced to eHarmony. In a Match.com ad they claim that they are responsible for "more marriages than any other site." The founder of Plenty of Fish claims 2,000 self reported successes and possibly 100,000 marriages because of it's free site. The numbers go on and on. Check out the article for yourself.

Although one should never believe everything they hear in an ad, there have been many successes with online dating. The actual numbers though are unclear. Bottom line, caveate emptor. Should you choose online dating, present yourself in the best light in order to maximize your chances of success. If you need help, we're here. Happy dating!

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2009 - All rights reserved
Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Woman Pours Boiling Water on Husband's Genitals for Cheating

For more information about our services, including online dating profile rewrites and critiques, live workshops on approaching women and starting conversations as well as private coaching sessions, click here.

I just came across a disturbing article in today's New York Post. You can check it out here: Great Balls Afire!

So what can we learn from this woman (as well as from our friend Steve McNair)?
1. Don't cheat on your wife; and
2. Stay away from CRAZY women!

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2009 - All rights reserved
Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

10 Commandments of Online Dating

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Follow these and you'll be all set!

POSITIVE COMMANDMENTS:
1. Always know what you are looking for in a woman;
2. If you determine that a particular woman is NOT what you are looking for, move on*;
3. Always make sure you are different than any other guy online (in a positive way);
4. Always present yourself in your best light;
5. Always get off the computer, and into an in-person meeting ASAP.

NEGATIVE COMMANDMENTS:
6. Never lie or misrepresent yourself anywhere in your profile;
7. Never copy all or part of someone else’s dating profile;
8. Never put salary information or anything else in your profile that hints that you have (or don’t have) money;
9. Never have spelling and/or grammar errors anywhere in your profile;
10. Never wait more than two emails to ask a woman for her phone number.

*Realize that NO ONE is perfect, not even you! That being said, move on and don't waste time (yours or her's) if you are unhappy.

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2009 - All rights reserved
Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Friday, July 17, 2009

Dating and Facebook

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There are basically two ways that Facebook can be used to find a date. The most commonly used method is to use it as a supplement to a traditional online dating site like JDate or Match.com. This is accomplished by using Facebook or other social networking sites to increase or escalate your connection with an individual by adding them to your friends list. The second is to use it as an online dating tool by joining interest groups and/or meeting friends of friends.

But please take caution when using Facebook to escalate your connections with someone you just met. Although we don't recommend immediately adding a potential mate to your friends list, it nonetheless seems to be more and more frequently done. We have written in the past about insuring that your profile is congruent with who you are - that is to say it accurately reflects the person you are. Your Facebook account should do the same.

An article in the July 14, 2009 Financial Times, If granny would disapprove, don't put it on the net, by Rhymer Rigby, elucidated two great points. The first one is something we all know, but many of us don't seem to take into account - what is posted on Facebook, Linkedin, Myspace, Twitter or any other social networking site is there for the world to see. Yes there are privacy settings, but one should also abide by the precautionary principle: If you aren't proud of it, don't post it.

The second point, that 'you are who your profile says you are' was made in reference to going on a job interview. However, the following quote is also paramount for online daters: "your profile on Facebook should be broadly the same as the person you present at an interview." Be who your profile says you are. No matter what your present situation is, there are many ways of presenting yourself in your best light, and that is what Online Dating Edge is all about.

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2009 - All rights reserved
Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Lying or Misrepresenting Yourself in Your Online Dating Profile

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This is the absolute WORST thing you can do in your profile. If you are looking to develop a meaningful relationship with someone, why in the world would you want to start things off with a material misrepresentation?

Here are some of the most common ways people misrepresent themselves online:
• A 36 year old woman says that she is 32;
• A married guy says he is single;
• A heavy-set woman describes her body-type as ‘petite’ (which by the way, is NOT acceptable just because you happen to be 5’1);
• A teacher puts down ‘physician’ as his occupation;
• A bald guy posts photos from five years ago, when he had a full head of hair (or is wearing a baseball hat in all of his pictures);
• A woman deliberately posts photos of herself only from the neck up in an attempt to conceal her true ‘body-type’;
• A guy copies someone else’s profile and represents it as his own.

I would like to point out one thing here. There is a fine line between lying in your profile and ‘embellishing’ a bit. So if you find out that someone made themselves an inch taller, 10 pounds (NO MORE!) lighter or put their location as Manhattan when they really live right across the river, you really can’t complain too much. However, this becomes a problem when the ‘misrepresentation’ is material – meaning that it is a significant change from reality.

The bottom line is this – YOU ARE GOING TO GET CAUGHT. You are who you are, and if you are not happy with that, you need to change that aspect of yourself. But in the meantime, be honest. It is not fair to waste other people’s time and resources because you lied to them. And look at it this way – you are also wasting your own time (and self-respect), because once they find out you are a fraud, they are going to drop you anyway.

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2009 - All rights reserved
Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Monday, July 13, 2009

Texting and Email to Setup a Date? Grow up!

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Guys am I being a wuss? I have gone out with this girl a couple of times and she only emails me or texts me. I'm all for email and texting, but do you think it's weird that she never calls or answers her phone? -Evan in Orlando

Evan, I'm sorry. It seems like you've found someone too busy to pick up a phone or have the common courtesy to have a conversation on the phone. Email should be used when first corresponding to a potential date and texting for quick messages. No one likes to be treated as unimportant and relegated to business like emails. Perhaps she is just immature and does not realize that this can come across as rude and selfish; either way tread carefully. No use wasting your time on a selfish or immature individual.

Some quick advise to our readers out there. Treat people with respect. If you are uninterested, move on. Otherwise, take the time to make a call.

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2009 - All rights reserved
Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Jon and Kate Gosselin Match.com Spoof

The guys and gals over at www.funnyordie.com have done it again! Here are the spoof match.com ads they put out with Jon and Kate Gosselin from "Jon and Kate Plus Eight"-
Unfortunately (or fortunately) neither one of us watched this show, but we laughed anyway.







Hope you get a laugh!

Friday, July 10, 2009

Advice?

For more information about our services, including online dating profile rewrites and critiques, live workshops on approaching women and starting conversations as well as private coaching sessions, click here.

Hi guys. I saw you speak in Boston some time ago and was wondering if you could take everything you spoke about and try to give your best sentence or two of advice about online dating? -Boston Bean

That's a great question. We both took a stab at this and here's what we came up with.

Alexander Stone: Easy. #1- Make sure you pick the right person.
#2- Don't screw it up.

Stephen David: KNOW WHAT YOU WANT. Know the kind of person you are looking for and the type of relationship you want.

You asked for a "sentence or two" and that's what you get Mr. Bean, if that is your real name!?

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2009 - All rights reserved
Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Nobody's Perfect

For more information about our services, including online dating profile rewrites and critiques, live workshops on approaching women and starting conversations as well as private coaching sessions, click here.

Why can't I find the perfect guy? Many of my friends seem blissfully married to "the perfect guy." Why can't I find mine? Why do I always pick a loser? There's always something that they do that screws things up! -Janine

First and formost the key word in your second sentence is "seem". NO relationship is perfect. There are always ups and downs. You also seem very negative describing past boyfriends as "loser[s]" and saying "they... screw things up." Dont you take any responsibility for broken relationships? Not every guy out there is a loser and perhps you are being too hard on some of them.

Here's a little advice:
1. Nobody is perfect.
2. Think positive thoughts and more positive things will happen.
3. A relationship takes work- by both parties!

Good luck!

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2009 - All rights reserved
Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics