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Wednesday, November 14, 2007

When is it time to settle down?

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Here's Michelle Hill with her take on a question from one of our loyal readers:

Question from a reader:

I am an old man whose son continues to change girls quicker than his underwear. How do I get him to settle down?

My first instinct is to ask how old your son is. If he’s 25, I’d say you’re going to have to wait a while until he’s ready to settle down. Now, if he’s 35, that’s a different story. While it varies person to person, men tend to start getting the nesting instinct at some point in their thirties.

That being said, however, there is likely very little you can do to ‘get him to settle down’. Committing to one person is a big step, one that has to be the decision of the individual making it. No one wants to be told what to do or be forced into something he is not ready for, especially not by his father! And while you may not want to hear this, marriage or other versions of long-term commitment is not for everyone. Your son could decide that he never wants to settle down.

Bottom line, just talk to your son. If you have concerns about his lifestyle, let him know. Otherwise, just let him figure things out on his own. Pressuring him will not make him more likely to do anything and will only make him resent you. He will appreciate your allowing him to be his own man.

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - All rights reserved
Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

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