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Thursday, July 12, 2007

Online Dating: 'My Perfect First Date'

Regardless of which dating websites you are using, there are going to be a series of short answer questions included as part of your online profile. Some essays, such as ‘About Me' and ‘The Person I am Looking For' are pretty much universal to all online dating sites (and what we at Online Dating Edge assist you with creating - click here for more info).

In addition to the basics, each website also has their own unique set of paragraphs. These additional sections of your profile are PRIME opportunities to show off your creative side - so don't overlook them!

JDate, for instance, has a section entitled, "My Ideal First Date." Not only is this question a good opportunity to show your sense of humor and originality, but you can also find out some interesting info on others by reading what they have to say.

For example, if a woman is talking about fancy restaurants and swanky lounges rather than a quiet place where the two of you can get to know one another, you may have a gold digger on your hands. On the same note, if a guy is talking about 'long walks on the beach' or 'dinner and a movie' while looking forward to calling you the next day, the WUSS alarm should be going off.

Here is an example of a guy's answer to this JDate question (sent by one of our female readers):
My Ideal First Date:

It's not where you are but who you are with right? If we're on a first date, I'm talking you to COSTCO. It has plenty of delicious free samples for us to chow on. There is usually a good movie in the TV section. They sell clothes and books, so we can talk reading and fashion. The home section has swings and a fountain (very romantic!). To get an a bit of a rush, we can go and smell the new tire stacks. Guess whats next to COSTCO? That's right. Home Depot. But that would have to be a second date.

I don't think he realizes it, but this guy is actually ON to something. Stores with many different departments are FUN places to go for a first date. But putting aside the creativity of his answer for a moment, there are a few things this guy can do to GREATLY improve this response. Here they are:

1. Grammar, grammar, grammar - Missing commas, sentence fragments, a lost apostrophe and getting 'an a bit of a rush' will KILL your profile. It also detracts from your central message.

2. Lack of mystery - By identifying the place and specifically what he intends to do there, this dude has essentially RUINED the possibly of using this as an actual date (which is a shame, because this is a GREAT idea). Why would a woman be excited about going somewhere when she knows everything that is going to happen ahead of time?

This dude could have accomplished the SAME result (and MORE) by saying something along the lines of the following:

"I am going to take you to a place you have NEVER been for a first date. Somewhere SO obvious, yet so elusive. Imagine having an INFINITE number of exciting things to do, all under one roof! If you think you can handle it, that is. If not, I hear that the guy two profiles before me is into long walks on the beach and Michael Jackson records."

3. Slight change of venue - Costco is a madhouse. There is stuff piled up everywhere, the aisles are crowded, and the foosball table is missing a goalie (and all the balls!). There is also no sofa to sit on while you attempt to watch your romantic movie on the 13 inch tv/vcr combo. Great idea, wrong spot.

Tomorrow we are going to examine one of my favorite places for a creative, yet inexpensive first date... stay tuned!

Alexander Stone & Stephen David
Copyright 2007 - Online Dating Edge / Approach Dynamics

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I disagree with your recommendation to remove COSTCO from the answer. It provides a great visual so she could actually imagine being there (who doesn't love COSTCO?), and it will weed out those gold diggers you don't want. Plus, while cute, I'd say it's rather doubtful that anyone will actually bring a first date to COSTCO. One other note about what's good about this response -- it's funny and cute - gives a little insight into this guy's sense of humor.